88 Thoughts I Had Whilst Watching the Game of Thrones Episode, "Eastwatch"

 As Jaime's survival hangs in the balance, I was more than anticipating the arrival of this week's Game of Thrones episode. Over the past seven seasons, we have watched this man go from arrogant villain who pushed a young boy out of a window, to someone we can all feel for. As more and more much-loved characters get thrown into life-or-death situations, it is proof that the stakes are ever-rising in the kingdom of Westeros. And that just makes me want to never look away.

1. Oh, thank God.
2. I have literally never been so relieved at a character surviving in my life.
3. And Bronn as well! When I realised that he was the one who pushed Jaime out of the way of the dragon fire, I really thought that it was going to be one or the other who survived
4. "You're fucked" "Don't you mean 'we're fucked'?" "No, I don't"
5. Oh, my God, Tyrion thinks that Jaime died. That is so heartbreaking
6. Dany, you can't tell them this just after attempting to roast them alive - then the whole "I'm not a murderer" "i don't want to burn you alive" thing doesn't really sit right
7.  No wonder Freddie Stroma didn't want to come back to play Rickon/Dickon if the dude is going to get burned five episodes in
8. Burn him already. Lord Tarly is such a dick
9. God, can you image a Tarly father-son reunion at the Wall? That would suck
10. The issue with Dany is that she has no mercy. She walks a very thin line between vengeful and mad
11. Though at least she swings the sword...? Or controls the dragon...?
12. Tyrion is like, "what the fuck have I gotten myself into?"
13. Well, Cersei doesn't look very happy to see him
14. This isn't a war you can win? I know what you should do, Jaime, switch sides!
15. I love the fact that Cersei isn't able to give Olenna the painful death she now wants to give her
16. I mean, I feel some sympathy for Cersei, her love for her children was her one redeeming quality after all, but with a son like Joffrey, the person who killed him should've been thrown a party to congratulate them
17. The CGI on that dragon is superb 
18. Is it sniffing him? Christ, a dragon is not a dog
19. Yet another nod to Jon's true parentage... how is that dude not putting together all of the damn foreshadowing?
20. He should draw a 'for' and 'against' table like Simon on Shadowhunters: reasons why I might be a Targaryen vs. reasons why I am probably not a Targaryen
21. Dany is like, you have touched my dragon, you have touched my heart... and my vagina
22. I like the idea of Dany rubbing the dragons' tummies every night until they fall asleep, or scratching behind their ears whilst she is up on their backs
23. The idea of the dragons being Dany's children works so much better in the books when it has been established that the whole situation with Rhaego has left her infertile. There, they are the only children that she is probably ever going to have. Here, it sounds like she's talking about some sort of domesticated animal
24. Like pugs or teacup Chihuahuas
25. So, are we finally going to talk about the whole coming-back-from-the-dead thing?
26. I mean, Jon was resurrected, but no big deal.
27. He keeps pretending that it never happened but if I was a zombie warrior, I'd be shouting it from the rooftops.
28. Although, I suppose there is slightly too much crossover between Jon's situation and the one where the White Walkers reanimate corpses and turn them into Wights.
29. It's like, "hey babe, can you help me fight these ice zombie thingys? Oh by the way, I also happen to be a zombie, but not one of those nasty, horrible ones that I want you to send an army to defeat, I'm the good kind."
30. Jorah!
31. I bet he's so fucking tired of hearing about his father.
32. Well, that hug was slightly lingering. Do I sense a love triangle in the works?
33. Is that raven having visions?
34. Ohhhh, Bran is warging into it
35. But it's only a two-eyed raven, is that allowed?... Why do I think that I'm funny?
36. Wow, the birds-eye view is really lovely.
37. And now it's not. Trust an army of ice zombies to ruin a beautiful vista
38. I love that they're just shambling along
39. They've probably been wandering for weeks, or maybe even months, I wonder if they chat or if it's spent completely in silence
40. I mean, sure they're an army of the dead, but that doesn't mean that they can't have a social life
41. Why is it that people are always ignoring the warnings of White Walkers? They ignored the warnings of dragons and look what literally just happened
42. Sam, my boy, talking sense
43. This is why you don't put power in the hands of old, white men who think that they're educated
44. It is surprising that Varys is having an attack of conscience
45. Taking a wight/white walker to King's Landing is officially the worst idea I've ever heard. Ever. I thought that Tyrion was supposed to be the logical one?
46. How I long for the Lannister brothers to reunite
47. These two are so weird, their dynamic has become so odd. It is precisely why the Starks should have never reunited
48. Jaime and Tyrion's scene is such a pivotal moment: it's where the dragons, white walkers and the politics collide, it's where everyone's storylines become one
49. Wait a minute...
50. GENDRY??????
51. "Thought you might still be rowing"
52. I'm so happy
53. I can't tell if Davos is bribing the Gold Cloaks or paying the fare
54. Game of Thrones viagra... Davos, I love you
55. Why oh why did he just walk past them? It's not as though there can be that many dwarves in King's Landing
56. Oh fuck off, Cersei
57. There is no way in hell that she's serious
58. Cersei can not be pregnant
59. Jaime, you fucking idiot
60. Gendry, you're underneath the castle of your father's greatest enemy, I mean, he killed her brother for Christ's sake. Telling people that you are Robert Baratheon's bastard son is not going to do you any favours
61. Omg, they're doing the trade insults thing that Robert and Ned did in the first episode
62. God, I love Davos
63. Jorah's utter devotion to her is just so adorable. I wish she felt the same so that they could live happily ever after
64. Jorah turns to have one last look at her, but Jon never does
65. She must be stood there, willing him to do so in her mind
66. Is this the first time we've seen Gilly this season?
67. Holy shit
68. Did Gilly just-
69. Is Jon legitimate?
70. Saaaaaaaaaam, listen to her
71. He was listening enough to pay attention to the number, at least
72. What is the thing hanging from the ceiling? I know it's the centre of the title sequence, but what does it actually represent in-universe?
73. Aw, but there is no one better than you Sam
74. I hope he doesn't head for home, although I can't imagine that would be likely
75. Littlefinger is plotting, and I'm still annoyed
76. What is he up to? Hmmmm
77. Because of course it is in his mattress... isn't that the stereotypical horny boy hiding place?
78. I have absolutely no idea what that note says
79. Sansa has horrible handwriting
80. Ugh
81. Tormund, how I have missed you
82. The Hound!
83. Oh yeah, I had forgotten about his vision and their quest north
84. It's weird how all these characters keeping meeting, it's almost as if they're building towards something...
85. Thoros of Myr and his fucking man bun
86. Berric is looking surprisingly alright and alive for someone who has died like 727176 times
87. "We're all on the same side" "How can we be?" "We're all breathing"
88. Noooooo, it can't end there!